Saturday, 3 November 2007

Forty-one shopping days to go

On Christmas Day this year the volcanic island of La Palma will erupt and the unstable part will fall into the sea, resulting in a mega-tsunami that will devastate the east coast of America, if the word of God is anything to go by. Or, rather, the word of Alasdair T R Laurie, who is, or was, a promising second-year PhD student at the University of Leeds in the UK. He did not finish the course after becoming a fundamentalist Christian.

All this is set out in his website, called unequivocally WorldEnds. Many will find some of his evidence difficult to follow; it is not easy, for example to see just how the date was first predicted by showing that the 666th name in the Bible is Solomon, the number of the beast, and I myself am totally confused by Laurie’s reference to the whore of Babylon being outlined by Hudson Bay (Canada), riding on the scarlet beast (Labrador). He does provide a map but this doesn’t really help much.

But while one may be unable to comprehend the main thrust of his argument, one must admire the way in which he presents it. Unlike many American fundamentalists, he has an excellent command of English: the syntax and grammar of his prose is quite sound, and his spelling is impeccable. If his reasoning is difficult to grasp, this is only because these are complex matters which would tax the exegetical skill of the keenest mind, even that of a bioinformatics PhD student who had actually completed the course.

Another point in Mr Laurie’s favour is that he has taken the trouble to pass on this particular warning to residents of the east coast of America, although the catastrophe lined up for December 25th will presumably affect the whole world, including Leeds. It seems that the tsunami which hit the Solomon Islands on April 1st this year did actually ‘herald an end to the capitalist ideology that is in opposition to following Jesus’, and ‘God is in support of this line of argument, but is giving extra warning to the Americans’. This is a clear rebuke to those who have ever doubted that the USA has a very special place in the affections of the Almighty.

Christmas in Maine, 2007
(actually, a microphotograph of organic crystals
by John Cheslik, entitled "Apocalypse")


Teddy III said...

Well now, there's a bit of luck: Tash and I are leaving Boston for Switzerland on 24th December so we shall be all right.
There may be a bit of a problem getting back, of course, but there are worse places to be stuck in than Klosters, so long as Prince Charles and his bunch of yobs aren't stuck there too.

Minerva said...

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.... Always my spontaneous reaction when Christmas is mentioned before December....

Tony said...

Hi there, Min!
Yes indeed, though I suppose that if the world is going to end on Dec 25th it is not unreasonable to let people know in early November.
Have you noticed how the poppies appear on politicians' lapels earlier and earlier? Ordered your Easter eggs yet?
Love to you. Please keep in touch.

Grumio said...

Persuasive stuff which gives us all pause for thought. I was following the cogent and closely argued theories with bracing clarity until I got to: "The professor was called John Nash (Nash sounds like 'gnash', relating to gnashing of teeth in Hell, and the name John alludes to myself)". This troubled me as, in my unenlightened narrow-mindedness, I couldn't see how 'John' could allude to 'Alasdair T R Laurie' or Mary Magdalene, as it goes. Or anything except, well, John.
I shall clearly have to give greater attention to the Texts.
PS Shall we bring our annual yuletide reunion dinner forward a couple of nights this year then? And make it a bit of a knees up? Perhaps even finally crack open the '61? It seems fitting, somehow.

Tony said...

Yes. that bit struck me too as something that passeth all understanding.
As for getting in our yuletide dinner well before the end, I agree, my dear fellow, good thinking. Bear in mind that our wives will need time to get their hair done before meeting their Maker.

Grumio said...

I didn't say anything about inviting him.

Hugh said...

He doesn't need an invitation, you fool. He's Omnipresent.

ruth said...

It will certainly put a crimp in my Christmas plans to vegetate gently in front of the television, when a tidal wave roars up the Irish Sea.
Unlike you, I am quite taken with the map that Alastair (John may represent his appointed role),so kindly provides. It looks as if Florida is the penis of the beast that is America.